because you begged me to put this on my blog
family and friends! hello! i know you're just dying to know what life in
canada is like, so i've graciously taken the time from my busy schedule to
put down a few things that might be of interest to you. in case you weren't
aware, i'm super popular here in canada-- the phone's always ringing off the
hook-- so my taking this time is just a small gesture of how much you really
mean to me, each and every last one of you (whoever you are, or think you
are). like i said, this is a huge sacrifice for me, so any praise is
appreciated. also, cold hard cash. cold hard cash is always appreciated.
gotta feed the monkey, if you know what i mean.
some notes on canada:
1.) i joined a choir! that's right, i joined a freaking choir. i know you're
like 'dude, it's about time. you have the voice of an angel, and i've been
saying all these years that your singing is an untapped goldmine.' well, i'm
finally listening to you, so shut up and listen to me. listen to me sing!
the choir is called 'solidarity notes' and is comprised of union members and
people in solidarity with workers and unions. no, that's not a joke. i'm
obviously not in a union (yet), but my husband is, and i try to support the
working folks when i can. i also love to sing, and believe (warning: crazy
hippie talk about to appear) that singing is a way to put more creative,
positive energy into the world. in fact, just two days before i discovered
this choir, i was talking to tavia (what's up, tavia?!) and i was like 'man,
when i move back to sf, i want to start a choir. a kind of urban singing
league. sing for social change, that kind of thing.' the next night~ i swear
this is true~ i was online looking for community choirs, and found this one.
i emailed the lady and she was like 'come on down!' so i did. since i
believe in synchronisity (if you will it, it is no dream) i was like 'oh my
god, this is a sign!' and since 'sign' is just a jumble of the word 'sing',
i had no choice but to join the choir.
yesterday was my first practise. i'm the youngest person in the group (one
old lady said to me as i was leaving 'we need some young blood around
here!'), and since invariably they all think i'm more like 20 than 27, it's
bound to be a hoot. they're all really nice, and made me feel super welcome.
i'm an alto. the director was going to make me a bass, but then i was like
'are you sure?...' so he made me an alto. anywho, we sing mostly protest and
worker songs. yesterday, we worked on 'more than a paycheck'~ which is a
pretty dumb song, if you ask me: there's a line sung by the altos (me) that
goes 'asbestosis, silicosis, brown lung black lung disease!' (i swear that's
true too) we also sang a song called 'burn baby burn'. this is real. i
wasn't singing at first, cause the only burn baby burn that i know is disco
inferno (not, for the record, a protest song~ at least so far as i know).
the director saw me not singing and was like 'if you're joining us for the
first time, just listen to the other members in your section and sing
along.' and since i was the only new one there, i knew he was talking to me.
so i slashed his tires later and wrote 'red commie bastard' on his
windshield in lipstick. okay, that's a lie. i don't wear lipstick. i wrote
it in the blood of union members.
we're also singing a song about che guevara. i like that
one best. it's kind of sad and mournful, but also a beautiful hommage to
some guy i've never heard of (che guevara who?). lastly, we practised
gnarles barkley's 'crazy'~ not because it's a protest song, but because the
director's name is gnarles.
they haven't asked me to do my first solo yet, but i'm just waiting. i'm
gonna take over that whole choir! it's gonna be mine! mine!!!!
(added choir perk: there's a super dope thrift store a block away from where
we rehearse, so that means that once a week i can check out the digs that
canadians don't want and for cheapo make them my own. canada is surprisingly
lacking in dope thrift stores, so this is a goldmine. like my voice~ a
goldmine.)
2.) we have a pet raccoon. well, 'pet' might be a little generous. mostly,
we have a raccoon that came the other night and went through the bag of
trash that we forgot on the porch. i didn't see him, but i know he was there
because he left a raccoon-sized and shaped paw-print out there, and the bag
of trash was all ripped up. (ripped like my biceps) we've named the raccoon
after our landlord, steve. we named him that because, just like the
landlord, steve the raccoon refuses to fix our oven.
(the oven joke? that's all tucker, baby!)
3.) i'm volunteering this weekend at the vancouver storytelling festival. i
found the gig online, and signed up for two shifts. but then the lady that
runs it was like 'hey, can you work till midnight on friday then at 8 in the
morning on saturday? i signed you up for eight-hour shifts.' and i had to
write back and be like 'listen lady~ i don't get up at 8 in the morning for
anybody, i don't care how good your storytelling might be.' then she called
me today and was like 'hey (no real greeting) i need people who have
drivers' licenses and cars.' and when i told her i don't have a car here,
she was like 'well, it looks like you're off the hook.' and she didn't mean
off the hook like awesome. she's freaking nuts, i'm convinced. i've got a
story for your festival, lady: you're freaking nuts. put that in your pipe
and smoke it.
4.) i might (might might, fingers super crossed) have the chance to teach a
writing workshop at a women's prison here in vancouver. tucker's friend
works there, and they need volunteers to come and teach the arts ('the
arts'), and i was like 'hell yes!' i'm going next week to meet the people i
need to meet (the prime minister, the queen of england, gnarles barkley) and
hopefully they'll be like 'oh my god, you're a genius! how did we ever live
without you?!' i'll let you know how it turns out. in the meantime, this is
something that i would love love love to do, so if you could give a
shout-out to whatever god you believe in, on my behalf, that would be rad.
i'll buy you a donut in return.
anywho, as you can see, life here is so exciting that all i can do is sing
and eat donuts. which is pretty much what was promised to me when i got a
degree in creative writing, so i can't complain. i hope you are all doing
swimmingly~ write soon and let me know if your life is even as mildly
interesting as mine is.
i love you!!!!
yours,
zipper
canada is like, so i've graciously taken the time from my busy schedule to
put down a few things that might be of interest to you. in case you weren't
aware, i'm super popular here in canada-- the phone's always ringing off the
hook-- so my taking this time is just a small gesture of how much you really
mean to me, each and every last one of you (whoever you are, or think you
are). like i said, this is a huge sacrifice for me, so any praise is
appreciated. also, cold hard cash. cold hard cash is always appreciated.
gotta feed the monkey, if you know what i mean.
some notes on canada:
1.) i joined a choir! that's right, i joined a freaking choir. i know you're
like 'dude, it's about time. you have the voice of an angel, and i've been
saying all these years that your singing is an untapped goldmine.' well, i'm
finally listening to you, so shut up and listen to me. listen to me sing!
the choir is called 'solidarity notes' and is comprised of union members and
people in solidarity with workers and unions. no, that's not a joke. i'm
obviously not in a union (yet), but my husband is, and i try to support the
working folks when i can. i also love to sing, and believe (warning: crazy
hippie talk about to appear) that singing is a way to put more creative,
positive energy into the world. in fact, just two days before i discovered
this choir, i was talking to tavia (what's up, tavia?!) and i was like 'man,
when i move back to sf, i want to start a choir. a kind of urban singing
league. sing for social change, that kind of thing.' the next night~ i swear
this is true~ i was online looking for community choirs, and found this one.
i emailed the lady and she was like 'come on down!' so i did. since i
believe in synchronisity (if you will it, it is no dream) i was like 'oh my
god, this is a sign!' and since 'sign' is just a jumble of the word 'sing',
i had no choice but to join the choir.
yesterday was my first practise. i'm the youngest person in the group (one
old lady said to me as i was leaving 'we need some young blood around
here!'), and since invariably they all think i'm more like 20 than 27, it's
bound to be a hoot. they're all really nice, and made me feel super welcome.
i'm an alto. the director was going to make me a bass, but then i was like
'are you sure?...' so he made me an alto. anywho, we sing mostly protest and
worker songs. yesterday, we worked on 'more than a paycheck'~ which is a
pretty dumb song, if you ask me: there's a line sung by the altos (me) that
goes 'asbestosis, silicosis, brown lung black lung disease!' (i swear that's
true too) we also sang a song called 'burn baby burn'. this is real. i
wasn't singing at first, cause the only burn baby burn that i know is disco
inferno (not, for the record, a protest song~ at least so far as i know).
the director saw me not singing and was like 'if you're joining us for the
first time, just listen to the other members in your section and sing
along.' and since i was the only new one there, i knew he was talking to me.
so i slashed his tires later and wrote 'red commie bastard' on his
windshield in lipstick. okay, that's a lie. i don't wear lipstick. i wrote
it in the blood of union members.
we're also singing a song about che guevara. i like that
one best. it's kind of sad and mournful, but also a beautiful hommage to
some guy i've never heard of (che guevara who?). lastly, we practised
gnarles barkley's 'crazy'~ not because it's a protest song, but because the
director's name is gnarles.
they haven't asked me to do my first solo yet, but i'm just waiting. i'm
gonna take over that whole choir! it's gonna be mine! mine!!!!
(added choir perk: there's a super dope thrift store a block away from where
we rehearse, so that means that once a week i can check out the digs that
canadians don't want and for cheapo make them my own. canada is surprisingly
lacking in dope thrift stores, so this is a goldmine. like my voice~ a
goldmine.)
2.) we have a pet raccoon. well, 'pet' might be a little generous. mostly,
we have a raccoon that came the other night and went through the bag of
trash that we forgot on the porch. i didn't see him, but i know he was there
because he left a raccoon-sized and shaped paw-print out there, and the bag
of trash was all ripped up. (ripped like my biceps) we've named the raccoon
after our landlord, steve. we named him that because, just like the
landlord, steve the raccoon refuses to fix our oven.
(the oven joke? that's all tucker, baby!)
3.) i'm volunteering this weekend at the vancouver storytelling festival. i
found the gig online, and signed up for two shifts. but then the lady that
runs it was like 'hey, can you work till midnight on friday then at 8 in the
morning on saturday? i signed you up for eight-hour shifts.' and i had to
write back and be like 'listen lady~ i don't get up at 8 in the morning for
anybody, i don't care how good your storytelling might be.' then she called
me today and was like 'hey (no real greeting) i need people who have
drivers' licenses and cars.' and when i told her i don't have a car here,
she was like 'well, it looks like you're off the hook.' and she didn't mean
off the hook like awesome. she's freaking nuts, i'm convinced. i've got a
story for your festival, lady: you're freaking nuts. put that in your pipe
and smoke it.
4.) i might (might might, fingers super crossed) have the chance to teach a
writing workshop at a women's prison here in vancouver. tucker's friend
works there, and they need volunteers to come and teach the arts ('the
arts'), and i was like 'hell yes!' i'm going next week to meet the people i
need to meet (the prime minister, the queen of england, gnarles barkley) and
hopefully they'll be like 'oh my god, you're a genius! how did we ever live
without you?!' i'll let you know how it turns out. in the meantime, this is
something that i would love love love to do, so if you could give a
shout-out to whatever god you believe in, on my behalf, that would be rad.
i'll buy you a donut in return.
anywho, as you can see, life here is so exciting that all i can do is sing
and eat donuts. which is pretty much what was promised to me when i got a
degree in creative writing, so i can't complain. i hope you are all doing
swimmingly~ write soon and let me know if your life is even as mildly
interesting as mine is.
i love you!!!!
yours,
zipper
posted by zipper @ 11:55 AM
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